Do You Still Like Us?

apparently still salty about being christian : a podcast trying to fix everything #067

‘we are done with your spectacle’
‘we are done with your old, musty godhood’
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“Big words...from such tiny girls.”
In a mad dash the 2 little mad girls run into the cramped and long forgotten room. They stand furiously heaving in front of a torn and rendered thing. Sad and pathetic their Captain knells before it.
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“You see, you have already lost....she is already wholly mine.”
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‘you are a pathetic king’
‘who leans too heavy on a shine past forgotten’
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‘Captain......’
‘Come back to us...’
The Captain turns towards the 2 little girls, tears streaming from her eyes.
“Save me from this monster.”
A deep, lost rolling laughter rolls forth from the Broken Throne filling every dark crack and shadow.
“She is ours.”
...
‘if you could take her’
‘you would, faker’
‘and so we end it’
‘now’

seriously, try 2 follow along with these 2 drunks : a podcast trying to be a podcast #066

Hair tangled thick with sweat clings to the 2 furious, little girls’ foreheads. Their chests heave with the effort, but they refuse to wilt to the heat of it’s power. As their freshly freed crew begins to stand to wobbly legs the 2 little girls determinedly climb over the freshly torn crimson curtains, now dull, muted and lifelessly piled high upon the floor. The room has become cramped and small, yet still dominated by that murky, milky mirror leaning against the far wall. The 2 little girls crawl over the heaps of fabric until they reach the other side, their 2 heavy sailor boots crash into the glass of that abominable, reflective surface, throwing tiny, newly worthless shards crashing down. A lost and old stone archway reveals itself from behind the crash, revealing a narrow and pinched hallway, coarse cold air blowing thickly towards them, everything leading to an ancient and astray place. They clearly see the Old King sitting upon it’s Broken Throne as their Captain continues to knell to it in complete adoration.
“I have you now little ones.
Yes, come closer.”
The 2 little girls determinedly continue forward.

we’re all dying, but maybe not today : a podcast trying to capture you’re imagination, really, kind of #065

‘we already know this dumb trick’
‘kill us if you could’
The 2 angry, little girls jump from their decrepit thrones and grab as much fabric as they can hold and pull with all their furious strength. A long moment stretches into hopeless silence as they strain and sweat. Until a deep tearing rips into the room. Rich, darkly layered fabric begins to fall to the floor in musty heaps as the 2 little girls rip everything down.
‘empty threats!’
‘from a empty forgotten king!’
A suffocating heat pours into the room as the 2 little girls rage and tear, rip, rend their way through every fold and crease. Their breath catches at the onslaught of heat, but they continue in their blind rage. Until they find a tightly wound lump of fabric, struggling and pressing, their strong fingers rip through the dark, crusty and crinkled fabric until one of their crew is free, freshly blinking and standing.
‘is that how you hide our friends’
‘we know your gimmicks now’

talkin’ about dreams...just try not to listen...we dare you...oh we also go total emo: a podcast working for that click #064

Beyond dark. Beyond horror. Beyond forever that foul shadow sinks.
Until a crimson room, deeply folded and overstuffed with darkly rich red fabrics focuses to now. A large murky mirror fills one wall. The 2 little girls sit on tarnished, mismatched and ancient golden thrones facing that looming mirror.
“She is mine. She is lost to you little lost ones.”
In the mirror the 2 little girls can see the Captain, on her knees at the feet of that decrepit, old king, adoringly kissing the rings on his bony, rotting fingers, her lips dry and worshiping.
“Leave her here with me. Go without your pointless fight and I will not smear your crew into forever never been. Go back to your ship and the rest of your nobodies. Go and leave this thing here to me.”

why are we talking about sex stuff again? : a podcast practicing SEO #063

‘it goes on forever’
“The old king hides behind his broken darkness.”
‘we must find a way through this murk’
“These daft doors blind the way, they open and open, but they never lead, we only run farther down this endless maze!”
‘we must stay calm, the Captain is gone and we must find her’
“She is mad now, there is no saving her!”
...
“We should turn around. Go back.”
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‘no’
‘we go on’
‘we find our Captain’
‘we win our terrible prize’
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“We will become never been.”
...
‘perhaps’
...
‘but not before we see that madden King’
‘not before we take what we have earned’
‘not before we try to bring our Captain back’
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“Ok. How do we go forward?”
...
...
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‘look how the shadows drip and pool into that corner’
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‘we dive in’
‘we sink to the bottom of that evil muck’
‘we go forward’

still doing christmas songs, oh and merry christmas! #062

the crew steps through the doorway. they enter a small room with an ornate, ruby door slightly ajar, the Captain’s deep steps clearly outlined in the soggy and gray sand leading straight to the door before they disappear. the crew steps through the doorway. they enter a small room with an ornate, emerald door slightly ajar, the Captain’s deep steps clearly outlined in the soggy and gray sand leading straight to the door before they disappear. the crew steps through the doorway. they enter a small room with an ornate, pearl door slightly ajar, the Captain’s deep steps clearly outlined in the soggy and gray sand leading straight to the door before they disappear.
‘we must stop’

constantly saying the bad words we never should : a podcast we’re marketing #061

Thick and vicious the darkness clings to them desperately, crawling across every inch of their skin as they plunge forward. The Captain is a faint and distant muttering somewhere out front, but time thickens with dark and the sounds become warbled and oblique. Everything becomes lost, everyone alone and everything forgotten. Still, slowly over eternity, the 2 little girls push forward, 2 hands tightly clasping and 2 hands determinedly searching the darkness ahead, until they find a friend. Everyone tightly holding on as they continue forever and away they again find another lost soul. And forward and finding they go until the entire crew is united, firmly clasping hands and of the same determined and dark path. Forever finally fades to a distance as they all see an ornate, onyx door, slightly ajar, appear in the gloomy distance ahead, the Captain’s deep steps clearly outlined in the soggy and gray sand leading straight to the door before they disappear.
‘we go forward’